The Character of Honesty

5/11/2020

Honesty can be defined as the quality of being truthful.

It may be a given that we should always be honest and truthful, but unfortunately, that doesn’t always happen. Honesty is so important to God that He made it one of the 10 commandments.

We have always told our kids that it is better to be honest and risk getting in trouble than to lie and be sure they are going to get in trouble.

The saying “be sure your sins will find you out” always rings true.

A lie will always be uncovered...eventually.

There have been times that we should have administered punishment for something they did wrong, but have instead chosen to forgive because they chose honesty and told us the truth about the wrong they committed. We choose to honor honesty. That doesn’t mean they always get off scot free, but it means that our kids know we treasure honesty above all else.

As a parent, one of the hardest things we have ever had to deal with is the dishonesty of a child. It is hard to know the balance between punishment and admonishment.

Sometimes we have gotten it right and sometimes we have had to go back to the drawing board. But one thing we quickly realized is that the problem isn’t a lying tongue, but a troubled heart.

Honesty is a heart issue. If you deal with the heart…everything else will fall into place.

Unfortunately, we are in a season where we are seeing a lot of lies swirling around us.

One of the boys recently came to me and asked how someone could lie so much.

I treasure these open conversations with my children. I don’t always have the answers, and in this case, I don’t have the answer.

I used this as an open door to discuss how that honesty is so important and ingrained into our character, but for some, they have lied so much and so often that lying is ingrained into their character. When confronted with a situation, your mind should default to what is right and true, but for some, lying is a habit and second nature.

Sometimes, I think people really don’t even know when they are lying. When one lie is told, it is easier to tell another lie and another and another until the web is so twisted, they don’t know how to stop the lies.

One of the most difficult things in life is to admit when you are wrong. Admitting to a lie takes courage and humility…and many people just don’t have the character to right the wrong of a lie. They think if they keep lying, it will all go away.

It may go away for a while…but there is always someone who knows the truth.

So what do you do when someone lies.?

If you can, call them out.

If they are a habitual liar…it may be time to walk away. Who wants to be around someone they can’t trust? It may be a very difficult decision…but it is better to remove yourself from an individual that cannot be trusted to tell the truth. If others know a person is dishonest, they may associate you with dishonesty just by association. Don’t let the dishonesty of others destroy your own honest reputation.

Never put yourself in a situation where your honesty is brought into questions.

Abraham Lincoln was known for his undying honesty and became known as Honest Abe. The story of how he walked miles to return the small amount of money he overcharged a customer is widely known.

When people hear your name, do they know they are dealing with a straight shooter, or do they have to question the words that come from your mouth?

If a person likes to talk about how honest they are, you may want to stop and take a hard look.

In my experience, the ones that have to tell you how honest they are…usually aren’t being very honest. They are trying to emphasize the words to cover up the dishonest actions.

You can’t control what others say and do, but you can always control what you say and do.

Make a promise to yourself that you will always be honest.

No matter how hard, no matter how painful, the easiest and most painless thing you can do is to tell the truth.

This is Us - our life, our story, our farm